Yup, it's an Easter story...
I woke up in the middle of the night feeling thirsty. I slid out from under the blankets and eased off the bed so as not to jostle Rebecca, my wife. She mumbled something in her sleep and turned over, but was soon snoring.
I pulled on my brown bathrobe and headed downstairs to get a glass of milk. I don't like the taste of our tap water.
I flicked on the switch for the kitchen and there was a four foot, white rabbit dressed in a blue coat. He held a basket that contained a chocolate rabbit, marshmallow peeps, and an assortment of other candy.
With two hops he bounded over to me, grabbed the front of my bathrobe and slapped his paw over my mouth. "Don't shout, you'll wake the children."
Staring into the rabbit's big blue eyes, I felt strangely calm. Whatever this strange apparition was, he wasn't here to do harm, of that I felt certain. I slowly nodded.
The bunny removed his paw. "I'm sorry, did I wake you? It's my first Easter on the job. I'm taking over from my Uncle, and I'm still getting the hang of it."
"No, I was just thirsty. It happens all the time," I replied, trying to reassure him.
The bunny took out his iPad and flipped through the screens. "Strange," he said, "I have you and your family down as sound sleepers. See, their a little sheep next to 'The Smiths.'"
"We're the Goldbergs."
"The who?"
"The Goldbergs. We bought this house from the Smiths last month and moved in last week."
The bunny sighed. "I didn't have a chance to update the database." He sighed again. "How many children do you have? Do I have enough baskets or do I need to get a few more?"
I hesitated, then said, "We don't celebrate Easter."
"You don't?"
"No."
"Well, you should give it a try. There's chocolate, and finding eggs. It's all a lot of fun."
"I'm a Rabbi," I said.
"Oh," the bunny scratched his ear. "I could see where that would make it awkward. I'll clean up the baskets and clear out the eggs before the morning."
"Thank you," I said. I got my glass of milk and started to head up to bed, then stopped. "One more thing," I said.
"Yes?" asked the bunny as he reached under the sofa to retrieve a purple egg.
"Please make sure Santa also updates his database."
THE END copyright 2013 John Lance
I woke up in the middle of the night feeling thirsty. I slid out from under the blankets and eased off the bed so as not to jostle Rebecca, my wife. She mumbled something in her sleep and turned over, but was soon snoring.
I pulled on my brown bathrobe and headed downstairs to get a glass of milk. I don't like the taste of our tap water.
I flicked on the switch for the kitchen and there was a four foot, white rabbit dressed in a blue coat. He held a basket that contained a chocolate rabbit, marshmallow peeps, and an assortment of other candy.
With two hops he bounded over to me, grabbed the front of my bathrobe and slapped his paw over my mouth. "Don't shout, you'll wake the children."
Staring into the rabbit's big blue eyes, I felt strangely calm. Whatever this strange apparition was, he wasn't here to do harm, of that I felt certain. I slowly nodded.
The bunny removed his paw. "I'm sorry, did I wake you? It's my first Easter on the job. I'm taking over from my Uncle, and I'm still getting the hang of it."
"No, I was just thirsty. It happens all the time," I replied, trying to reassure him.
The bunny took out his iPad and flipped through the screens. "Strange," he said, "I have you and your family down as sound sleepers. See, their a little sheep next to 'The Smiths.'"
"We're the Goldbergs."
"The who?"
"The Goldbergs. We bought this house from the Smiths last month and moved in last week."
The bunny sighed. "I didn't have a chance to update the database." He sighed again. "How many children do you have? Do I have enough baskets or do I need to get a few more?"
I hesitated, then said, "We don't celebrate Easter."
"You don't?"
"No."
"Well, you should give it a try. There's chocolate, and finding eggs. It's all a lot of fun."
"I'm a Rabbi," I said.
"Oh," the bunny scratched his ear. "I could see where that would make it awkward. I'll clean up the baskets and clear out the eggs before the morning."
"Thank you," I said. I got my glass of milk and started to head up to bed, then stopped. "One more thing," I said.
"Yes?" asked the bunny as he reached under the sofa to retrieve a purple egg.
"Please make sure Santa also updates his database."
THE END copyright 2013 John Lance
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